Do you love your spouse? or Do you love money? Or can you love both?
If you are not careful, you might choose money over your spouse. It’s an old trick of the devil to fool you into thinking keeping your money is more valuable than keeping your spouse. Let me tell you, that’s a fool’s move. When I met a couple married 63 years the other day, I was reminded of the value of keeping your spouse around. Unless you are in an abusive marriage, it is so important to work things out. And even if there is abuse, with God’s help (yes, God uses professionals, too), that can be worked out, too.
The Bible says in 1 Timothy 6:10, “The love of money is the root of all evil.” Think about it. What does money mean? Personal power. Power to get what you want. When you get married, you are supposed to be one. It should be about “we,” not me. That doesn’t mean you lose your individuality. It just means you are partners in love. Interdependent. You don’t just think about your interests anymore. You are thinking about “our” interests. So it should become “our” home, “our” kids, “our” future, “our” money.
Too many couples have difficulty trusting their spouse with their “future,” their “kids,” and their “money.” That may be because their spouse truly is irresponsible. Or it may be because they disagree with their spouse’s approach to life and living.
Couples who fail to come together on finances miss out on a level of intimacy they could be experiencing. That lack of trust can be the difference between an OK marriage and a GREAT marriage. It may feel easier to have separate accounts and pay separate bills. You may feel less confusion and more control that way. But in the long wrong, that approach can take a toll on your marital intimacy. You must be building whatever it is that God has put in your hands – together. You must be working toward the same goals and the same purpose. United we stand, divided we fall.
Don’t get me wrong, some couples have that separate finances thing down. They have figured out how to do it and maintain a deep level of intimacy. But I’m sorry to say many couples have not figured that out. Both often feel deeply rooted resentment about their spouse’s “selfishness.” They are simply not working together. Divided interests lead to divided results.
Man, this money thing is complicated. Especially for couples with a business, ministry, or cause. If you are not careful, money can divide and conquer. That is why I have put together training for couples on how to work together to build a business/vision without destroying their marriage. Click here to sign up today.